Monday, April 30, 2007

The ER...Late Night Edition

So it was a usual night. Kiddos drifted off to la la land in my room watching my TV while Lawdog, yours truly and one more were sitting in the main hall shooting the breeze. The wife comes in and asks me to put the little tricycle motors in their own beds and I jump right up to oblige her.

Here's where things go south...quick.

Put the boy in his bed without a hitch.

Pick up my daughter and she starts to cry telling me that her ear hurts...did I mention that it's nigh on 10pm? No? It was. I carry her on to her bed and send in Dr. Mom to assess the situation and get sent to Wally World for children's Tylen-something.

By the time I get back, my daughter is in tears and not showing any signs of letting up, so I do what any self-respecting man would. I grab my 15" Mag-Lite and look in her gods. There was something the size of a pea in her ear.

Breathe Tole...It's not moving, Tole...Everything is gonna be ok, Tole.

See I have this overwhelming need to protect my kiddos, especially my little girl. I want to put mass quantities of hurt on anything that comes within miles of causing her any grief, but I'm at a loss here. So, I once again do what any red-blooded American man would do in this situation...

I call my mommy.

She calms me down and tells me she will go with us to the the by we're closing in on 11pm now. On the way to the hospital, I damned near killed myself when my little girl, with all the calmness of someone 8 times her age says to me, "Daddy, I can feel whatever is in my ear moving and going pop pop pop."

Oh bloody hell, she's got a bug in her ear. Eww Eww Eww!!!

Just to finish this, because I am still juiced on adrenaline. After being examined by first an EMT, then an RN and finally an NP, we determine that the temporary tube that the Ear, Nose and Throat doc put in almost a year ago is making its exit. No big deal.

My daughter's reaction? "COOL? Will I get to see it when it comes out?"




HollyB said...

Ah, I remember those times...
And it is pretty "Kewl" to see a foreign object previously surgically implanted into your body work it's way back out. Gee, Daddy, every kiddo knows THAT.

TBeck said...

How about this one?

While a toddler, my daughter had this weird predilection about sticking stuff up her nose.

One day she gives an enormous sneeze and flies out. Something large. Something large and green. It's Mega-Booger or some damn thing.

No, it's a piece of foam rubber that she had picked out a seat cushion and crammed up into her sinus cavity. It was apparently there for quite some time, getting crustier and greener every day.

Kids. How do they survive in the wild?

Anonymous said...

Hey Tole, is it true that Lawdog got hitched recently?

TBeck said...

Vic 303,

Check out LD's site. No nuptials, it was a job interview.